Who Do I Think I Am?

This morning, after reading the exquisitely-written Open Letter to Dr. Henry Louis Gates, Jr., posted by my friend, Luckie Daniels of Our Georgia Roots, I found myself responding with a comment on her blog that ended up sounding more like a post in itself, so I've decided to copy my response to my own blog.
The topic here was the new show, Who Do You Think You Are?, which will be airing on NBC, beginning on March 5th.  The show will feature "the quest to discover the roots" of seven celebrities.  I strongly believe that, although the intentions of the network (an extension of the original program aired in Canada via the BBC) are good; they, and other shows, like the African-American Lives series, by the well-respected and honorable Dr. Henry Louis Gates, miss a veritable opportunity by not opening their programs up to feature "regular" American researchers, who are working so hard to discover our often elusive roots.  So, in response to Luckie's letter to Dr. Gates, I offer these additional comments:

Luckie,

I just HAVE to take a few moments away from my vacation in paradise to comment on this letter! We are certainly two of a kind, for I must admit that just a few hours ago, I started to type out a “tweet” in response to the “WDYTYA Veiwing Party” concept, asking, “Am I the only one who is NOT excited about this show?”
It’s not that I don’t like the concept of the program, but ever since it was announced, I’ve felt a twinge of angst because I watch these shows when they air, and see the work that so many of us put decades of our lives into being done in a matter of a few hours or days by professional genealogists for “famous” people who have to do nothing but sit back and receive the gift of their ancestry. I’m always left feeling a bit insulted because this is how many outsiders to family history research are being introduced to it. It’s made to look too easy, too quick, and much too profitable (in terms of the payout of finding documentation) than what the reality is, especially for most African-American descendants of slaves. I had already planned to write to someone (I just wasn’t sure who) to propose that, rather than just featuring celebrities, that perhaps one of the networks might decide to “gift” some of the hard-working, dedicated, “regular” folk who are out here researching our roots. We are doing so while holding down full-time jobs, raising families, caring for elderly parents, and scrimping together funds to support the passion that takes over us to learn what we can of our history. Many times, we are using our personal leave from work to take expensive research trips, spending days and days in libraries, courthouse basements, deeds offices, and cemeteries; and having to stay in hotels, eat out (if we stop to eat) and pay for travel to and from our ancestral locations. I believe that just as much (or perhaps even more) interest could be gleaned in a program that reaches out to help the average researcher (think Extreme Makeover – Family History Edition!), as there is for the programs featuring celebrities. Certainly, those of us who’ve put in the research-equity would have an even greater appreciation and emotional response (great for TV) to being gifted with the work a professional researcher and perhaps an all-expense paid trip through time to the ancestral homes of our ancestors.
I guess since this has turned out to be more than just a quick comment, perhap we might call it, “Another open letter to whomever might be listening”

Just something to think about….


Who do I think I am? First and formost, I am a child of God! I am a descendant of slaves and slave-owners, of free blacks, and Native Americans. I hail from hard-working, self-preserving people who deserve to be discovered and have their stories told! I am a mother, an aunt, a cousin, a friend. I've been designated by my ancestors to disover and tell their stories. In essence, I am my family GRIOT, and I will continue to seek my family's history until every brick wall is smashed down and the stories within them are told.

Renate
www.tribalpages.com/tribes/nadasue

(PS... I'm writing this on the first morning of my vacation in Hawaii, thus the reference to my "vacation in paradise".)

Tombstone Tuesday - An Unusual Find

Last week I visited Calvary Cemetery, in Norfolk, VA, the resting place of several of my maternal ancestors. Although my personal goals for the visit were met with disappointment, due to the fact that I learned that my ancestors were buried in a completely unmarked plot, I was pleasantly satisfied with my visit to the original section of this cemetery.  Calvary is the oldest African-American cemetery in Norfolk, and has several former slaves resting in its grounds.  I took several pictures and made a couple of recordings in that part of cemetery, and then just decided to ride around a bit more. It is a very large cemetery!

Just as I was about to leave, I encountered this massive brick structure with it's inscribed obelisk, so out of curiousity, I checked it out.   I thought this too interesting not to share, so here is my submission for Tombstone Tuesday.

The inscription on the monument reads:

Reverend William Lewis family vault:

Rev Lewis died Nov 12, 1882 aged ?8 years

Mary E Lewis died c 1886 aged 66 years

                                                              Husband and Wife

Follow Friday - Two Lories

For my first Follow Friday post, I want to share the blogs of two readers who tend to leave comments for me, from time to time.  They are each named, "Lori", and they both inspire me with their supportive comments, and their well-written, thoughtful, and heartfelt posts.

So, here's to Lori of Genealogy and Me






                             and

Lori E. of Stories of My Ancestors

I hope everyone will stop by and check out these two wonderful blogs, and thanks, Lori and Lori for following Into the Light!

Renate

Sentimental Sunday - The Stuff I'm Made Of

I've been going through some ups and downs with my research of late, and regarding my maternal side, it's mostly been downs.  As is common for most researchers from time to time, I've found myself being rather, um.... quiet.  I think we all set out thinking (or at least, hoping) that we will discover the strengths of our ancestors, and perhaps uncover some of the positive contributions they made to society, but, that is not always going to be the case. 

When I first began my research 13 years ago, I did so in an attempt to discover who I am.  I didn't know anything at all about my ancestors, beyond my maternal and paternal grandmothers, both of whom I personally knew.  I didn't grow up hearing family stories.  As a matter of fact, I really didn't have any sense of there being a "history" of my family.  My maternal grandmother, Mary (Davis) Thomas, lived just 30 minutes away from us, in Norfolk, VA, but it was my paternal grandmother in Louisburg, NC, Anna (Green) Yarborough, with whom I was closest.  Both of these women were constants in my life, and my grandma Thomas even ended up living with us during  my last couple of years of high school.  Therefore, despite the fact that I knew little to nothing of my grandmothers' past, or of the ancestors who preceded them, they were both a part of the fabric of my life.

So today, on Sentimental Sunday I dedicate my post to my grandmothers, the women who raised my parents, and who each had a significant impact on my development into the person I am today.  And not only that, but when I look in the mirror, I see them both in my reflection - the body of one, and the face of the other.  As I've learned more about their lives, and the hardships they each faced, I beam with pride as I recognize what it had to take for each of them to have managed and sustained their households in the loss of their husbands and in the face of repeated financial blows and/or significant family stressors that would have brought many others down.  But, both of my grandmothers stood tall in the face of adversity and beat the odds of their time.  As single parents, they raised successful children and both managed to keep their homes, which are still in our family today.  Through hard work and faith in God, Mary Thomas and Anna Yarborough lived well, and left a legacy of self-sufficiency, perserverance, and good will towards others.  Many times I've been complimented on the way I've raised my children and managed to rise above the many hard times I've been faced with in my adult life, and I'm often asked the question, "How do you do it?"  Well, now I know, and I have the perfect answer:  "It's the 'stuff' I'm made of!"

Anna Green Yarborough

Anna Beatrice Green was born on January 18, 1891 to parents John Wesley and Susan Dunstan Green.  She was the daughter of Nathaniel Hawkins and Anna B. Green (who she was named for). Anna was born in Rolesville (Wake County), NC, but the family soon moved a few miles north to Louisburg, in Franklin County, but returned to Wake County when Anna was in her teens.  Little is known about Anna's early life, but in 1919, she married Calvin R Yarborough, Jr., a widower with three children.  Anna moved to into the Franklin County home that was built by her new husband and his brother, and became mother to Vida, Priscilla, and Frederick Yarborough.  Over the next five years, she gave birth to her own three children, Susie, Calvin III, and Arthur (my father).  Unfortunately, Calvin began to suffer with the symptoms of tuberculosis, the cause of his first wife's death.  He fell ill, and passed away in 1929, leaving Anna to raise six children alone.  Anna, who was, at the time, involved in the creation of a new church in Louisburg (Mt. Hebron United Holy Church) relied on her faith and worked hard keep the taxes paid on the house that her husband had built, and to keep her children fed, clothed, and educated.  She worked as a laundress, as well as for private families as a housekeeper and nanny.  She also took in sewing, all the while maintaining a leadership role in the church she'd helped to create. She had a sweet disposition and was known throughout the little town of Louisburg as, "Miss Anna".  Anna walked several miles each day to and from her jobs on the "white side" of town.  She never did learn to drive.
As Anna grew older, her three biological children helped to support her so that she no longer had to work.  (The older three died of various causes in their 30's and 40's.)  Her greatest joy was in spending time with her four grandchildren, all the children of her youngest son, Arthur.  She was an excellent cook, and was known for the wonderful cakes she baked.  She took pride in her house and her yard, and gave special care and attention to her "award-winning" rose bushes in her front yard.  She loved to sit out on her in her porch in her brown, wooden rocking chair and wave at all of the passers by, many of whom would stop for a chat.
In February, 1977, when I was 15 years old, my grandmother, Anna Yarborough, died of complications from colon cancer.  She is buried in the family plot on "the hill", which is the Louisburg City Cemetery (formerly, "for the Colored").

Mary Davis Thomas

Mary Davis was born December 26, 1897 in Littleton (Halifax County), NC to parents Walter and Minerva Brown Davis.  According to the 1900 Census, Mary had a brother, one year older, named Samuel, and in 1910, the Census states that her mother had actually born three children, but only one (Mary) was living.  It is likely that Mary never knew or remembered her two siblings, because she never mentioned them to my mother, or to either of her other two children.  Mary's maternal ancestors were her grandparents, Asa and Luvenia Ross Brown, and great-grandparents, Everett and Minerva Ross.  Her paternal grandparents were Lewis and Dollie Davis.  Mary's large extended family all lived in the Littleton and Roanoke Rapids areas of North Carolina.

Around the turn of the 20th Century, several members of the Davis family migrated to Norfolk, Virginia, seemingly to work as longshoremen.  Walter, Minerva and Mary were part of this migration.  By 1910, they, as well as several of their family members are living in the Lambert's Point section of Norfolk.  In 1915, a young Mary was wed to her first love, Allen Walker, at the St. Marks AZUA Church in Norfolk.  Allen worked as a brakeman on the Virginia Railroad.  He and Mary were quite in love and lived happily, sharing a home with her parents until his untimely death, which occured sometime early in their marriage. 

Mary, though heartbroken, had to go on with her life.  At some point, she began doing hair in the porch room of the home that she'd shared with Allen, and she petitioned the owner for it's purchase.  In 1924, the house in Lambert's Point was hers, and it is still in our family today.  Sometime later, Mary met Daniel Webster Hill, and they were married in 1929 in Philadelphia, PA, and in 1930, Daniel, had joined Mary and her parents in the home.  Mary began her family with Daniel; first giving birth to a son, Howell, and then, in 1934, to a daughter (my mother), Mary Anne.  In 1936, Mary's father, Walter, died, but she still had her mother, Minerva there to help her with the house and the chldren. Unfortunately, sometime around 1938, Daniel Hill abandoned his family for reasons unknown, and was never heard from again.

Once again, Mary was left on her own, but this time, with two children. Mary was able to carry on with her very successful hair-care business.  True love struck again, and she married Charlie Thomas, a railroad worker with whom she fell deeply in love.  Mary gave birth to her youngest daughter, Jane, in 1940.  Charlie was a loving and caring provider to his wife, daughter, and step-children.  It seemed that the family had finally found joy, but tragedy struck again, as Charlie was killed in a railroad accident, leaving Mary a widow, once again. 

Understandably, Mary lived the rest of her life without a spouse.  She continued to do hair, and also worked as a secretary and receptionist at the local YWCA.  Her mother, Minerva, who was her partner in raising the children, died in 1960, after they were all grown and gone.  Mary carried on, living alone in the home that she'd purchased in 1924.  At some point, she joined, and became a faithful and committed member of Jerusalem Baptist Church in Norfolk. In the mid-70's, when Mary's health began to fail, she moved in with her daughter Mary's family in Hampton, VA, and later into a nursing home in Chesapeake, close to where her son lived.  Mary Davis Walker Hill Thomas, who'd lived to see three generations of her descendants, died in June, 1986, at the age of 89.  She is buried in Calvary Cemetery in Norfolk, VA in a plot with several family members, including her parents, and her beloved last husband, Charlie.

Mystery Monday - Can you date this photo? - Mystery Solved!

Today I'm reaching out to my readers for a bit of help. 

I have had this picture in my possession for quite some time, and I've always assumed it to be my maternal grandmother, Mary Thomas.  However, even though it looks exactly like her, I've always been a bit bothered by two things:  First, her clothing doesn't seem quite right to me for the time period of the age she looks to be in this photo.  And secondly, no one in my family knows who the man is, although if this is my grandmother, there's a chance that this could have been her first husband, who died not long after they married.

I don't want to give any details about my grandmother's age, etc., because I'm hoping that some of the "experts" out there will take a look at the photo and leave me comments with suggestions of the approximate date, or even the decade, that is was likely to have been taken.  That way, I can more definitively say that this is my grandmother, and if not, I'm sure it must've been her mother (and her father). 

Thanks, in advance, and please feel free to pass the link to this post on to any photo experts you may know!

Renate

Addendum:  January 18, 2010 - 7:10 p.m.
Wow!  What a great community this is!  Thomas, you are right on the money!  I came in this afternoon from a jaunt across the water (local lingo meaning across the Hampton Roads Bridge tunnel to Norfolk) where I went to check out the cemetery where I've learned that my grandmother, and several of my other maternal ancestors are buried.  I wasn't able to find her grave, as the cemetery was humongous, and the office was closed for the holiday.  However, while I was over there, I remember that I had in my possession my grandmother's old tin box with all of her important papers, and I thought I recalled seeing something in there about the cemetery. 
When I got home, I read your comment and posted it to the blog, and because of it (and how much I trust your knowledge and judgement) I'd decided that this had to be my grandmother, Mary Thomas, and not her mother.  The dates you gave for the clothing match perfectly with the age that my grandmother would have been at the time the picture was taken - somewhere between about 18 to 25 years old.  With that solved, I was also going with the assumption that the man would have been Allen Walker, my grandmother's first husband, but I didn't know for sure, until....
I decided to grab the old tin box to look for the information about the cemetery, and as these things go, I started perusing the other documents in the box.  One of the first things I found was the actual marriage certificate for my grandmother and Allen.  From this I got his full name, place of birth, parents' names, so occupation, and I added all of this to my tree on Ancestry.com.  While there, I decided to go on and do a search on him, and I found a couple of documents, but none more important than the one below - his WWII Draft Registration.  As you will see, this document describes the man in the picture to the tee, and so now I know for sure that the beautiful picture above is of my grandmother, Mary and her first husband, whom I'm told she loved dearly, Allen Walker. 

Mary and Allen's marriage was cut short, sometime after 1920, but before 1924, when he was killed in an accident while working on the railroad.

So, as often happens, mysteries are quickly solved when shared with others.  Although the ancestors lined things up for me today to be able to find some of the answers myself, Thomas' assertations about the period of the clothing served to solidify my conclusions about the subjects in the picture - my grandmother and her first love, Allen Walker.

Grateful,
Renate

Sentimental Sunday - Happy Birthday to Me!

Yesterday I celebrated a birthday - an event that I don't take for granted at all.  I am thankful for the opportunity to add another year to the count, and I pray that God sees fit to give me many more.

I had a very quiet day, for the most part, save a few tense moments at my mom's assisted living center, when I had to go head to head with a staff member about a situation with her care, but other than that, it was really a "me" kind of day -filled with rest, relaxation, and research, as well as a soothing bubble bath! :)  I did nothing special, and even ate leftovers for dinner.  I ended my day with an unsuccessful outing to one of my favorite clothing stores, only to arrive and find it completely bare with a note on the door stating that they were closed for remodeling and would reopen in March.  (That's how my luck runs..lol.)  So, as a consolaton prize, I decided to go and piddle around in Barnes and Noble for a while.  There, I relaxed with copies of, "The Washingtons of Wessington Plantation", "100 Years of Lynchings", and of a Hawaii travel guide (for my upcoming trip).  After perusing these materials to my satisfaction, I returned home and delved back into my favorite pasttime.  (I'm sure everyone reading this knows what that is.) 

All day long, I received calls from friends who wanted to wish me a happy day, and of course with each call came the inevitable question, "What are you doing to celebrate?"  Very few seemed to believe that I was as content as I sounded to just be doing what they considered to be... NOTHING.  But I was.  And, although I will admit that in previous years of celebrating alone, I've occasionally (not often) given myself a pity party, this was not one of those years.  Why?  Because this year I got a very special gift on my Birthday-Eve - one that surprised me and changed my entire perspective on everything.  My mother remembered my birthday!

Now, to some, this won't seem like a big deal, but I know that there are many of you who completely understand.  You see, my mother, a once vibrant, professional woman, has been a victim of a dulling of her intellect and memory, which, I believe, has been brought on more by lack of engagement and stimulation than anything else.  She has not been diagnosed with Alzheimers, but instead, has a movement disorder that in some ways mimics Parkinsons, but isn't quite that either.  My mother's intellect is still mostly intact, though dimished in some areas, but she knows everyone, remembers pretty much everything about her life, and can hold a good, lucid conversation most of the time.  However, there are other times - which are becoming more frequent now - when her brain seems to go to sleep, and she can't get her thoughts together or her words out right.  At those times, her comprehension seems effected, and someone who didn't know better would think she did indeed have the big "A".  Last year, on the anniversary of my birth, she was experiencing one of those phases, and for the first time in my life, my mother didn't know it was my birthday, and even when I explained it to her, she gave no emotional response.  So, Friday night, when I was talking to her on the phone, I told her that it was January 15th. When I asked her if she knew what the next day was, her response, "It's your birthday!" was the absolute most-bestest gift I could have gotten!  As our conversation went on, she asked me all of the appropriate questions: Was I doing anything special?  Were my daughters doing anything for me?  Had I heard from them?  I answered all of these questions and told her I'd see her the next day.  We talked about a few other things, and before we hung up, she remembered to tell me to have a happy birthday.

Perhaps now that I've opened the door, I'll begin to talk more about my mother's very unusual and frustrating health situation, which has been ongoing for over a decade, but for now, I just wanted to share this great gift that she gave me.  I did spend time with my mom yesterday, and thanked her for having me 48 years ago.  I even asked her to tell me a bit about my birth, which she did - but just a little.  She did repeat several times though that everyone kept looking at me in the baby bed and saying what a pretty baby I was, and each time she said it, she got a sweet smile on her face, as she remembered.

Today, on Sentimental Sunday, I'm sharing a picture of my mother that I just love for some reason.  I never saw this picture until about a year ago, when I was going through some of her old files.  The picture is a souvenier photo that was taken at Jack Dempsey's restaurant on Broadway in New York City.  My mother, who was a student at Hampton Institute at the time, was on trip to New York with her college beau, "Jimmy".  I have cropped him out because I don't know him, so I feel the need to respect his privacy.

Mary Anne and Jimmy, sometime between 1952-1955

Thanks for reading.  It's been an emotional few days.  Please continue in prayer for the people of Haiti.

Renate

Happy 101 Award from Lori and Sandra!

I'm so grateful to my genea-friends, Lori, over at Genealogy and Me and Sandra of, I Never Knew My Father, for choosing me for the "Happy 101" Award!  Both of these ladies are great bloggers, whose postings are always honest, entertaining, and heartfelt.  I hope all of my readers will check out their blogs!

The Happy 101 Award comes with a couple of "must-dos".  First, I'm to share ten things that make me happy.  Next, I must select ten other bloggers to receive the award.

10 Things That Make Renate Happy

1. The security I have in my relationship with the Lord, Jesus Christ.
2. Waking up each morning.  (I don't take this for granted.)
3. Knowing that my daughters are safe, happy, and prospering.
4. Watching the sun rise over the horizon while sitting out by the ocean.
5. Beautiful sunsets.
6. Watching a good movie with hot buttered popcorn and an icy cold Coke.
7. Relaxing on the beach with a good book.
8. Gazing into the eyes of an infant while as he/she drifts s-l-o-w-l-y off to sleep in my arms.
9. Watching old videotapes of my daughters when they were younger.
10. Enjoying good times and good food on the occasional "Girls Night Out" with friends.

Now, to pass the torch, I'd like to give this award to:

Our Georgia Roots
Reclaiming Kin
Before My Time
Roots'N'Leaves
But Now I'm Found
Find Your Folks
Conversations With My Ancestors


Happy blogging!
Renate